Queens Eats




Major eats in my neighborhood, Elmhurst, Queens!

Every time

Every single time.

Seems



Washington, DC!


Scuba Diving



Time is moving, seasons are changing.

But internally...are not the leaves still the same?

Golden Hour


...Is really just a few golden minutes. And yet...isn't that how most (golden) things work.

How fun you've been so far, November. So, different. So...How is the year almost over?

What kind of things should we be wishing for - is wishing even fair any more?

Sleeping is better...sleeping is (safe)...let's go back to sleep.

Still

Don't we all dream...
But is it safe too?
I'd like to think so
-closes eyes.

Congrats

I had the weirdest dream this afternoon and it left me waking up feeling so raw. Who'd have thought you could have such intense nap dreams.

I believe it took place at a celebratory party... and a number of friends throughout my life were there, including my beloved sewing teacher and friend Allison. In the night it was mentioned about my new career. And being supportive as she always is, I could tell something was bothering her. It was her eyes. Even in my dream I could see her eyes. Was she heartbroken I wasn't doing fashion anymore. Her reaction was kind of in disbelief. She asked if I would ever go back to the industry. And I told her that I have been thinking that one day I would.

It was such a strange dream because Allison is a person who I know just wants me to be happy, and would be excited for me no matter what. But I could feel her heart break so clearly in my dream. It woke me up hours ago, and can't stop thinking about it ever since.

NYC SERIES - Summer of Play


Like a flower





Tinkerbell

My foot had just barely reached on board when bright blue eyes suddenly widened, asked if I would like any water and in sweeping motions hands me two packaged bottles. "Please let me know if you will anything"

Mystical. Such a strong energy. Almost like you are meeting a cartoon character. Bright. Beaming. Frail. Happy. So happy.

"Are you new?"

[How would you know that]

"Aren't you SO excited" *clamps hands* *slightly bends knees*

[enthusiastically nods, I am, just nervous af]

And after other pleasantries promises to come right back.

Like a shining beam of light. So genuine. Almost unreal. Like the personality you give a cartoon.
And somehow I felt comforted. There are such incredible spirits in the world and we are made to make each other feel good. A divine appointment.

What a wonderful, super strange world.

First Flight

Shine your light really bright today.

Quality

I begin each year with a word that I believe will set the tone and goals for the next 365 days.
2 years ago, that word was "Quality". 

I wanted to begin and live that year ensuring quality friendships, quality interactions, and quality in all the work that I do. 

Lately, that word has popped into my mind a few times over and over. How can I become a higher quality man? More than a man with goals and dreams. But a man that can handle adversity. A man that has high and healthy self-esteem. A man that cares for others. I'm consciously reaching to be a man like that. 

The other thing I've been thinking a lot about is... not everyone is going to like you. No matter how much you try to be a "good person". It is a very common theme that taught to us early on. But why is it such a surprise when you encounter a situation like that. Why does it not prickle less? I think it must be I am trying to rationalize their feelings. 

Now a little over a month ago, I met up with someone who I thought was my friend, but de-friended me from social media just days before. So I thought to myself, oh this will be interesting, and they're being nice to me because we have this person in common. But to my surprise, we enjoyed each others company and felt beyond accommodated. It was the strangest happening. The lesson there was it's hard to see the full picture of someone sometimes, that I shouldn't judge a situation pre-maturely, rather give it a chance to play as it will, and that sometimes I will never know what's really going on or why someone does something, but to live gently to both parties and to see what happens. I thought this person didn't like me for some reason and I made all kinds of rationalizations: they think I'm too gay, they think I'm too fake, they think I spend to much time on social media. But we ended up having a great time. 

Again, weird. 

But in terms of being a quality guy, I've got to be open to what's going on around. Not closed off. Sure someone may not seem to like you, but get curious about it. Maybe there are some things I could improve i'm not aware of. Maybe there's nothing wrong with me at all, and you could be more present and assisting in their life. I'm not sure where I'm going with this anymore. But keep on improving Michael. 

My dear Michael


San Francisco! California Series


Inspiration Book 34

"Breathe in. Breathe out and decide"