April 11

12:02 AM Michael 0 Comments

Goals:

- To learn something new everyday - As cliche as it sounds, learning is one of my largest motivations. To look at something differently, or to look at something I had never looked at before with a bright light.

- To see my friends as much as I can - this one can be kind of tricky, especially hanging out with friends in an affordable way, but totally honest, sometimes meeting up in the middle of the day is the best thing.

- To become debt free - for a while, I was totally swiping with my eyes closed. Not so great. But, the other day I sat down, and made a pretty solid plan. I think becoming debt free has become the new american dream for my generation.

- To see the entire world - I know this sounds ridiculous - but I have become more and more familiar with the globe, to the point it seems so familiar and so doable when looking at a map. Only problem is the world is full of wonder in every country. To each place you go, you receive hundreds of recommendations in that same country. All of which I want to make possible!

- To be fully genuine in my actions and in what I say. This one comes from observing people who I feel like they are living and speaking in truth. Not just "the truth", but "in truth". Like as a way of life. I admire this.

- I want to do an insane deadlift by the end of the year. I already have the number in my head. haha. We can do it!

- Identify my fears. I know this sounds kinda weird. Why should you acknowledge / give life to your fears? To more smartly tackle them. "This is what I can do, this is how I can handle them"

- To develop my core, my pillar of #selflove. As cheezy and trendy and bubble bath filled as self love is.... the kind I have become charmed to pursue is building a strong marble pillar inside yourself that loves yourself so deeply no matter what awful thing someone does to you, you have yourself and your love to pick you up.

- Take more pictures. I totally value the opinion taking pictures take you out of the moment. But the more I look at it, all the pictures that i take become treasure. Surfing through old photos to me is golden and a gift and I'd like to devote a few trips to photos.

- My biggest current goal in my life is creating projects that promote understanding - between different cultures, between friends, between lovers, city dwellers and midwest farmers. It has become something I have become extremely passionate about, because we really don't understand one another. Everywhere I go in the world we really all want the same things. We really all have dreams and wishes. And what I dream and wish most of all is for each other to realize this. Creating human connections. How can I do this.......

'Positive' Thinking

11:42 PM Michael 0 Comments

They say, 'You should be happy' because of g, h, i, k. And sometimes, lots of times I am. But the truth is, self to self, there's a lot of times I'm back to square one. Is it good to have experiences like this, well, i'm sure it really proves the point that it "makes you feel alive". But honestly, most of the time, that is the problem. It's not so morbid really. Just torment - looking back - looking at yourself - looking at ...

How delusional my wishes are

shadow

9:34 AM Michael 0 Comments

"Our traumas do not go to sleep long after the breaking happens. They stay with us.
They haunt our hours. And they steal from us. They steal our joy, our energy, our foresight, our spirits and sometimes our sanity.


It's time we speak about this. About how we silently carry shadows in our bones. How we have stone-like heaviness in our hearts and how the day is sometimes a warzone between waking up or staying in bed, of forgetting or failing to forgetting, of memory playing back and forth in our minds, taking us as prisoners, throwing us in the sea of our despair"

-Gaamangwe Joy Mogami

Stella

1:02 AM Michael 0 Comments

Is such a pretty name isn't it. It's kind of like a happy name. Not the beer of course. More like a star. Un Estrella - Estella - Stella.

Haha idk, so warm.