95 Percent of the Time
I'm wondering if I'm even good enough to do fashion design. The other students here are so, so good. It seems incredibly difficult sometimes. I wonder if some future self of mine is looking at me now like such a silly boy. It is so hard to be truly inspired. I guess, what is inspiration? I think I try to post, or reblog any thing that moves me (my mental, my heart) in some way- as if some reaction took place. I have no idea what to do with my collections. I think before I was trying to make them look like clothes of "progress", slightly avant gardey, but I don't know if any of that was really me. A true, honest collection should be a reflection of yourself, of the designer, making each designer different and unique. It's not that fashion has been "too difficult" because I'm absolutely amazed at the days I am able to survive every day. It's simply that it is so, so, so broad, and encompasses so many different people, and photographs, and makeups, and accessories, and color stories, and books, and I wish I could have it layed out before me and I just knew it all. I have no idea what to do. There were SO many fantastic little known designers in one of the books, but why are they not nearly as popular as some of the upcoming greats. So many doors, so many doors to take down. So many people, so many beautiful visions, I just feel like mine is not beautiful enough.